A was an elegant Ape Who tied up his ears with red tape, And wore a long veil Half revealing his tail
Which was trimmed with jet bugles and crape. B was a boastful old Bear Who used to say,— “Hoomh! I declare I can eat — if you'll get me
The children, and let me — Ten babies, teeth, toenails and hair!” C was a Codfish who sighed When snatched from the home of his pride,
But could he, embrined, Guess this fragrance behind, How glad he would be that he died! D was a dandified Dog
Who said,— “Though it's raining like fog I wear no umbrellah, Me boy, for a fellah Might just as well travel incog!”
E was an elderly Eel Who would say,— “Well, I really feel — As my grandchildren wriggle And shout‘ I should giggle’ —
A trifle run down at the heel!” F was a Fowl who conceded Some hens might hatch more eggs than she did,— But she'd children as plenty
As eighteen or twenty, And that was quite all that she needed. G was a gluttonous Goat Who, dining one day, table-d'hote,
Ordered soup-bone, au fait, And fish, papier-mache, And a filet of Spring overcoat. H was a high-cultured Hound
Who could clear forty feet at a bound, And a coon once averred That his howl could be heard For five miles and three-quarters around.
I was an Ibex ambitious To dive over chasms auspicious; He would leap down a peak And not light for a week,
And swear that the jump was delicious. J was a Jackass who said He had such a bad cold in his head, If it was n't for leaving
The rest of us grieving, He'd really rather be dead. K was a profligate Kite Who would haunt the saloons every night;
And often he ust To reel back to his roost Too full to set up on it right. L was a wary old Lynx
Who would say,— “Do you know wot I thinks?— I thinks ef you happen To ketch me a-nappin’ I'm ready to set up the drinks!”
M was a merry old Mole, Who would snooze all the day in his hole, Then — all night, a-rootin’ Around and galootin’ —
He'd sing “Johnny, Fill up the Bowl!” N was a caustical Nautilus Who sneered, “I suppose, when they've caught all us, Like oysters they'll serve us,
And can us, preserve us, And barrel, and pickle, and bottle us!” O was an autocrat Owl — Such a wise — such a wonderful fowl!
Why, for all the night through He would hoot and hoo-hoo, And hoot and hoo-hooter and howl! P was a Pelican pet,
Who gobbled up all he could get; He could eat on until He was full to the bill, And there he had lodgings to let!
Q was a querulous Quail, Who said: “It will little avail The efforts of those Of my foes who propose
To attempt to put salt on my tail!” R was a ring-tailed Raccoon, With eyes of the tinge of the moon, And his nose a blue-black,
And the fur on his back A sad sort of sallow maroon. S is a Sculpin — you'll wish Very much to have one on your dish,
Since all his bones grow On the outside, and so He's a very desirable fish. T was a Turtle, of wealth,
Who went round with particular stealth,— “Why,” said he, “I'm afraid Of being waylaid When I even walk out for my health!”
U was a Unicorn curious, With one horn, of a growth so luxurious, He could level and stab it — If you did n't grab it —
Clean through you, he was so blamed furious! V was a vagabond Vulture Who said: “I do n't want to insult yer, But when you intrude
Where in lone solitude I'm a-preyin’, you're no man o’ culture!” W was a wild Woodchuck, And you can just bet that he could “chuck”
He'd eat raw potatoes, Green corn, and tomatoes, And tree roots, and call it all “good chuck!” X was a kind of X-cuse
Of a some-sort-o’ - thing that got loose Before we could name it, And cage it, and tame it, And bring it in general use.
Y is the Yellowbird,— bright As a petrified lump of star-light, Or a handful of lightning- Bugs, squeezed in the tight'ning
Pink fist of a boy, at night. Z is the Zebra, of course!— A kind of a clown-of-a-horse,— Each other despising,
Yet neither devising A way to obtain a divorce! & here is the famous — what-is-it? Walk up, Master Billy, and quiz it:
You've seen the rest of‘ em — Ai n't this the best of‘ em, Right at the end of your visit?
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