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1842–1914

BIMETALISM.

Ambrose Bierce

Ben Bulger was a silver man, Though not a mine had he: He thought it were a noble plan To make the coinage free.

“There hai n't for years been sech a time,” Said Ben to his bull pup, “For biz — the country's broke and I'm The hardest kind of up.

“The paper says that that's because The silver coins is sea'ce, And that the chaps which makes the laws Puts gold ones in their place.

“They says them nations always be Most prosperatin’ where The wolume of the currency Ai n't so disgustin’ rare.”

His dog, which had n't breakfasted, Dissented from his view, And wished that he could swell, instead, The volume of cold stew.

“Nobody'd put me up,” said Ben, “With patriot galoots Which benefits their feller men By playin’ warious roots;

“But havin’ all the tools about, I'm goin’ to commence A-turnin’ silver dollars out Wuth eighty-seven cents.

“The feller takin’‘ em can n't whine: ( No more, likewise, can I ): They're better than the genooine, Which mostly satisfy.

“It's only makin’ coinage free, And mebby might augment The wolume of the currency A noomerous per cent.”

I do n't quite see his error nor Malevolence prepense, But fifteen years they gave him for That technical offense.

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BIMETALISM. · Ambrose Bierce · Poetry Cove